Saturday, July 17, 2010

Local Cat Wanted For Impersonating A Scottish Fold


Seattle, WA

Police in Seattle are looking for a cat who pretended to be a Scottish Fold Friday so that she could stop, detain and rob an unsuspecting motorist of his giant cinnamon Elephant Ear pastry.

According to investigators, the robbery occurred Friday between 8:45 and 9 p.m. near the Bite of Seattle.

Police said the victim was driving away in his car when a cat “resembling a Scottish Fold” waved him to the curb.


The victim's accurate description helped lead police to eventually name a suspect

Police said the cat masquerading as a Scottish Fold was actually a husky Tortoise Shell female of approximately 7-10 years of age, weighing 18-20 pounds, who was seen earlier that day taunting small children with her ears turned inside out, a shoddy attempt at disguise.

Believing the assailant was having an emergency, the victim pulled to the shoulder of Mercer street. He was then approached by the cat.

The victim, a 9-year-old, neutered Domestic Short Hair named Jeff, said the quick driving maneuver caused him to inadvertently smear grease, sugar, and cinnamon on the dashboard and steering wheel of his car.


Police said crimes have been on a steady incline at the Bite of Seattle over the past five years

The assailant was wearing casual clothing but had a police badge, squirt gun and was carrying a portable radio, police said.

The assailant never said what law enforcement agency she represented and eventually told Jeff to exit his car and take his clothes off.

Reports state Jeff complied and was handcuffed. During the search, the assailant took an undisclosed amount of cash and salt packets from the victim’s pants and "violently snatched" the crisp, warm Elephant Ear pastry he had been eating.


A noted two-time felon and Former-Feral "Ramona the Pest" is now sought by police as a suspect

Forensic examination of the car turned up traces of sugar and cinnamon on upholstery and the steering column, confirming the victim’s testimony.

She had a “little bit of a beard and a scar beneath her right eye,” the victim said.

Police said the victim’s accurate description of the assailant led them to believe two-time felon Tortoise Shell Ramona The Pest, who is already wanted for string fraud, could have also committed this crime.

Sharyn Thoma-Guay reporter-at-large

3 comments:

Freya's Staff said...

Ramona the pest is INNOCENT!

Elyse said...

I say he is INNOCENT as well: http://www.cat-toure.com

Angie, Catladyland said...

Salt packets...hee hee... Innocent :)

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